Wednesday, January 14, 2009

"Where is home for you?" Part 2

My home is with my fiancé Tim. If home is where the heart is, a part of my heart is definitely in Pittsburgh, a part in England, a part in California, and a large part in Utah where my family and friends are. But no matter where I am, if I'm with Tim, I'm home.

It's so strange and so wonderful how incredibly comfortable we are, and have always been, when we're with each other. Most of our relationship has been long-distance, so we've had a lot of time to really talk and get to know each other. And somehow that has translated into being comfortable with each other when we get to be in the same place. I visited Tim in California last Thanksgiving, and I was a little nervous about seeing him. I had been in Pittsburgh (and away from him) for fourteen weeks, and in that time we'd decided we wanted to get married and talked very seriously about making that happen. Our relationship had gone through some fairly drastic changes in the time apart, and I didn't know how it would affect our time together.

But we never missed a step. From the moment he found me at the airport and kissed me good right in front of the LAX crowds, it was completely natural, completely normal, completely right to be there with him. Whether we were making Thanksgiving pies or taking a walk or getting lost in Long Beach or going to see a movie or cuddling as we watched a movie on the couch, there was a strong and at times almost submerging sense of belonging. I sometimes didn't even notice it was there because it was so constantly present. When I am with Tim, I feel the most like myself, and that should be the way we feel when we're home. Home should be the place where we feel the most safe, the most loved, the most sure of ourselves, the most free to think and act and be who we are without fear. A place where our true selves---good, bad, ugly, beautiful---are allowed to shine forth. And Tim makes me feel all of that, more than I've ever felt it.

My other half, my best friend, my one true love, my soul mate....I know it sounds naïve and I know that in many ways I am, but I also know that Tim is my home.

3 comments:

  1. You captured that feeling of belonging very well, Kate. I think that "natural" feeling with the person you love is key in feeling "home", and guarantees that no matter where you go, home will be right there next to you. Congratulations!

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  2. Check out the song "You Remind Me of Home" by Ben Gibbard.

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  3. Nice writing. Could be worth a longer piece to explore more deeply the sense of home one feels with a loved one.

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